Day 11- New Eyes

Today’s Quote:  “The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp.”-John Berry

I hope that you were inspired by the piece of my testimony that I shared with you yesterday. 

One of my favorite parts of that story is just how amazingly refreshing and unexpected everything turned out after I gave God the reigns I had been holding onto so tightly. 

And I know that I didn’t get into all of the juicy details of our reconciliation, but the most magical slivers can only be understood by me and my maker.

I just love how it’s all so personal with Him. To each our own beautiful, one-of-a-kind redemption story.

But I do notice one common thread that runs through them all. All stories of true redemption and beautiful restoration have it: Forgiveness

The call to forgive those we never thought it possible to forgive.

In this scenario that would be #9 (and probably a handful of people that you “hate” because of him).

Now I realize that the idea of forgiving #9 can be a scary concept to some of you. 

You think it would mean being vulnerable to him again, and your experience has taught you that’s not safe. 

But let me assure you that what I’m talking about here is not the same thing you’ve been doing in the past. This is not about hoping to forget all of the pain he’s caused you so you can keep living your same old life. That’s called reckless amnesia, and we all know it doesn’t work. 

What I’m talking about here is something that happens between you and God. An inner release of control and anger. Asking Him for a set of new eyes that no longer see people through the cloudy vision of all of the emotions, experiences, and pain that they’ve caused you; but now, clarity and freedom from their control.

Oh, girls, that is the rarest thing.

So how do you go about beginning to truly forgive someone who has hurt you so much? Someone who has cost you so much? 

By praying for him on a regular basis!

And I mean actually doing it, not just thinking about it! Remember, knowing something is very different from doing it. 

We can know all types of things about forgiveness, and how necessary it is. We can know it to be true with everything in us. But it won’t change us. We can meditate on it for hours, but it still won’t change us.

God is the only one who can take something and sew it into the fabric of our hearts. 

We cannot, no matter how hard we try. 

He’s the only one who can do the works deep down in the depths of us. The places that we live from.

That's why we need to talk to Him about this stuff, and we need to make it a point to allow Him the time to change our outlook on this guy. 

So set time aside for it- like I did.

Make it a part of your regular release/prayer time!

And in the meantime, as often as you think about #9, pray for him!
 When you miss him, pray for him. 
      When you’re tempted to call him, pray for him. 
          When you are physically assaulting him in your mind,   

                               stop, take a breath, and pray for him.

Pray that God would get ahold of him and change his heart
Pray for your unhealthy love for him to transition into a genuine care for his well-being. Ask God for a healthy outlook where you are no longer holding his weaknesses against him, but rather praying that God would help him overcome them.

Pray for him, as well as all of the girls that you hate because of him.

Girls, it is the easiest thing in the world to hold a grudge against someone, especially in this kind of situation. 

But refusing to give that up is like holding something back from God. It’s like saying “I’ve still got this Lord.” 
And nothing good will come out of it. 

So many women carry bitterness around from a past relationship, and it’s never pretty.

Don’t think that you know better than God. “Don’t be wise in your own eyes.” -Proverbs 3:7

A woman who knows anything is one who knows she has a loooong way to go.

And forgiveness, although it takes a lot of strength at first, will take you a looooooong way in terms of maturity and inner beauty. 

It’s a refiner’s type fire. And it’s one of the best things you could allow God to do through you.

“If you will take God up on what He offers so that you can live in victory, you will find thankfulness in your heart for every person who let you down. For ultimately, their failure set you up for this most ecstatic relationship you will ever experience.” –Beth Moore 

Today's Dare:
Remember how you made that sign for over your bed that says, "Do Nothing!"?

Today I want you to add a subheading that says, "except pray for him."

And I dare you to actually follow through with that. To see past the clichéd concept of forgiveness, and to really release your anger to God daily, and ask Him to show you how to forgive.

It will make all the difference in the world, especially in this kind of situation. 

And write these little formulas in your journal:

unforgiveness = relationship baggage = hard, rigid female.

forgiveness = FREEDOM = the ability to be the soft and beautiful female you were made to be.